


Step Into the Shade

by annabeth_hamilton



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Eventual Fluff, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/F, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Some Humor, as canon as possible
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2020-01-23 17:12:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18554179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annabeth_hamilton/pseuds/annabeth_hamilton
Summary: Ahsoka has left the Jedi Order after being framed by her best friend, Barriss. Betrayed and alone, she decides to visit her friend and learn the truth of what happened. With nothing but a recovered lightsaber and the help of her remaining friends, she seeks the truth in her feeling for Barriss and everything that has happened.Rex and Fives help her, and so do some other familiar faces from TCW.(Background Rex/Fives, I'll be posting a fic about their relationship in this world shortly!)Updates twice a week!





	1. Loss

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Everybody!
> 
> This is going to be a longer fic, and I plan on updating it as often as I can. This is the first in a duology about Barrissoka and their lives after leaving the Jedi! I have a pretty clear plan so this should go quickly. 
> 
> Please leave comments about how I'm doing and stuff like that! if you have suggestions/requests, please /ask me on Tumblr, email me, or comment! I also love it when you guys send me stuff! 
> 
> Tumblr: @classylunafan  
> Email: pitlyd265@gmail.com
> 
> -Eliza

Tears streamed down Ahsoka's face as she walked away from the only home she had ever known. She willed herself not to think of how broken Anakin had sounded, and forced herself to stare at the setting sun. Ahsoka already felt conflicting emotions rising in her: relief that she would finally be free of the Jedi, and overwhelming sorrow and regret that she was leaving Anakin and their makeshift family. She thought back on all the happiest times in her life; all with Anakin and Rex and the men, and the other ones, all Barriss. 

    Barriss. 

    How could she? How could she betray the Jedi so spectacularly and let Ahsoka take the fall? The Barriss Ahsoka knew was gentle and kind; she was a healer, not a killer. She remembered the droid factory on Geonosis, how they had protected each other. She remembered the Geonosian Brain Worms, how Barriss and Ahsoka had talked the next day. And perhaps the most stinging memory of them all had come just before Anakin and Ahsoka had been deployed to Cato Nemodia with the men. 

_ "Are you all right, Barriss?"  Ahsoka grinned at her friend sprawled on the training mats of the Jedi Temple.  _

_       "Of course!" Barriss took Ahsoka's outstretched hand and allowed herself to be pulled up. Barriss's hand was warm, but not sweaty. Their hands lingered together a beat too long, and Ahsoka pulled away, blushing. From across the room, Anakin smirked at her. Ahsoka rolled her eyes and turned to the younglings they were training. They were the same ones she had taken to Illum and the same ones who had rescued her from Hondo and his pirates. Katooni looked up at them with adoring eyes.   _

_     "Is that how most Jedi spar?" She asked, her eyes wide. It was true, Ahsoka and Barriss's spar had been different. They had moved almost impossibly quickly, each anticipating the others moves and effortlessly deflecting them. The Padawans were close, everybody knew that, but this spar showed just how well they knew each other. When Ahsoka had finally managed to land a blow on Barriss's leg, everybody had cheered, including Master Luminara and Anakin, who had been watching the spar.  _

_      "No, youngling, that is how  _ friends  _ spar," Luminara looked pointedly at Barriss. Ahsoka cringed. So their closeness hadn't gone unnoticed by their respective masters.  _

_      "I agree. Allow Padawan Offee and me to demonstrate what it looks like when you  _ don't  _ know your opponent," Barriss flinched, and Ahsoka smiled at her reassuringly.  _

_      "Go for his arm," Ahsoka hissed as Anakin took his place opposite Barriss. Anakin glared at her.  _

_       "Snips!"   _

_       "Sorry master!"  Ahsoka grinned back.  _

_        Both practice lightsabers whirred when the Jedi activated them.   _

_      "Stinging or numbing?"  Anakin asked the Padawan.  _

_      "Numbing" Barriss said, without hesitation. Both changed their training sabers to numbing. The duel commenced. Barriss followed Ahsoka's advice and deliberately attacked his non-mechanical arm side. Ahsoka watched Barriss intently, smiling to herself. Barriss had developed so much since she had last seen her. She had more diamond tattoos on her face, which showed that Barriss knew that she was maturing. Her pale green skin was smooth, and her eyes were narrowed in concentration. Ahsoka had not noticed how beautiful Barriss had become.  Finally, Barriss landed a light blow on Anakin's arm. Ahsoka's heart fluttered when Barriss smiled faintly at her.  _

_     "Ow!" Anakin complained. Barriss grinned sheepishly. Anakin resumed his onslaught with more ferocity than before and managed to drive Barriss to her knees swiftly. Ahsoka willed Barriss to get back up, but Barriss only gritted her teeth when Anakin knocked her training saber away and pointed his blade at her neck. Ahsoka felt a tinge of anxiety, although she knew Barriss wouldn't be injured.  _

_      "I yield," Barriss said quietly.  _

_     "Good job, Padawan Offee. Not many Padawans have managed to land a blow on a Jedi Knight," Barriss glowed with the praise, and Ahsoka felt a pang that the smile was not directed at her. Nevertheless, she was happy that Barriss had done so well against her master, and that he had praised her accordingly.  _

_     They helped the younglings for a bit until Yoda came in and asked the Padawans to leave.  _

_      "Your masters, help, I need,"  He told Barriss and Ahsoka. Together, they walked out of the training room, laughing at Yoda's strange dialect. Ahsoka gently mocked Yoda with her impression of him as soon as they were out of sight.  _

_     "Hungry, I am. Walk with me, will you?" She said. Barriss laughed and took Ahsoka's hand. Ahsoka blushed, and they walked to the dining hall together.  _

__

__ Ahsoka felt more tears threaten to bubble out of her. She missed Barriss. 

    She was past the steps descending from the imposing temple, and she knew she had to pull herself together. None of her Senate friends were on the planet, and her other close friends were all clones and Jedi. She sank down on a bench overlooking the bustling streets of Coruscant and began to think. She needed somewhere to stay, something to do. Ahsoka knew a few people on the lower levels of Coruscant, but none of them were reputable and most of them were probably long gone. The only Jedi she had trusted were Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Barriss. She couldn’t turn to Anakin, not after seeing how  _ broken _ he had looked when she said she wasn’t coming back. Obi-Wan had been a part of the council that betrayed her. And Barriss had framed Ahsoka and killed Jedi to prove a point. Barriss, whose lips had twisted into a cruel sneer as she claimed her guilt.  

    Wait.

    The Barriss Ahsoka knew would never have done such a thing. That hadn’t been Barriss.  _ Something  _ had happened, and Ahsoka needed to know what. She had to see Barriss and to do that, Ahsoka needed to call Rex. 

    She stood up and walked over to the comm station next to her. Ahsoka glanced around called Rex. A moment passed, and he appeared on the holo.

    “Rex here,” He said. Rex appeared to be lying down with somebody tucked in his arms. Wait. Was that  _ Fives?  _ Ahsoka’s purpose momentarily forgotten, her jaw dropped.

    “ _ Rex!  _ What in the-” She was interrupted by a particularly loud grunt on Rex’s end. 

    “Commander! What can I do for you? “He looked as embarrassed as she felt. 

    “What are you doing?” She stared, aghast. Ahsoka knew the clones sometimes had… relationships with each other. But Rex? And Fives? 

     “I-we-” Fives cut in, yawning. 

    “Commander! Congratulations on your acquittal!” He seemed positively unruffled by the transmission. 

    “Oh, thank you! Actually, now that you mention it, I need your help.” She changed the subject as quickly as she could, “And you don’t need to call me Commander anymore. Just Ahsoka.” 


	2. Duels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahsoka meets somebody unwelcome. We are introduced to the mess that is Barriss Offee.

 

     “And how can we help you?” Rex and Fives both looked absolutely heartbroken that Ahsoka had left. Ahsoka had known that the men had been close, but she hadn’t realized that her departure would hurt them so much.

    “I need you to convince the Coruscant Guard to let me visit Barriss.”

    “How are we supposed to do that?” Fives sounded impatient.

    “You know Commander Fox, right?” Both clones rolled their eyes in disgust, “I don’t like him either. But he is the only one besides the Chancellor himself who might let me see Barriss,”

    “Remind me again why you want to see the person who framed you for murder and got you expelled from the Jedi?” Now Rex sounded almost furious.

    “I don’t think she meant to-” Ahsoka paused, “I think somebody did something to her, and I want to help her before it’s too late,”

    “I’ll see what I can do. I used to be friends with Fox,” Rex said the Commander’s name with such fury that Ahsoka almost regretted asking.

    “Thank you, Rex. I’ll comm you tomorrow morning,” Ahsoka felt more unwelcome tears pricking in her eyes. She already missed Rex and the men.

    “Of course, _vod,”_ Ahsoka blinked. She had no idea that the clones thought of her as a sister, “May the Force be with you.” He added after a pause.

    “Stay safe, Ahsoka,” Fives smiled at her. The holo faded away, leaving Ahsoka alone. _Kriff,_ she was going to miss them.

    She still had no place to stay, nowhere to go. She didn’t even have her lightsabers, and she had no desire to look for them. Ahsoka had heard of Jedi who had left the order and gone on to create their own orders, but she didn’t want to be so easily trapped by another oligarchical group that forbade everything that made life happy. But the worst was the idea of losing the ability to help people and do good. That was the aspect of being a Jedi that Ahsoka had always loved the most. Maybe she could volunteer to join the GAR. Heavens knew that they were always short on Generals. She could have her own battalion of clones and-

    No.

    She would most definitely have to see the Jedi, and she couldn’t trust them.

    Not yet, anyway.

    Ahsoka was trapped at the station, anyway. She had no credits, her card had been lost or confiscated. The Temple area of Coruscant was wealthy, so she doubted that anybody would help her. And she was easily recognizable and she still looked like a Jedi. She was helpless. Helpless and hopeless and alone.

    Ahsoka sank back onto the bench and buried her face in her hands.

     What was she going to do?

    The constant Coruscant traffic noises filled her ears, and she was glad that nobody was on the platform.   
    It was almost nightfall when she felt a warm hand on her shoulder. Ahsoka jerked up, surprised, and saw a cloaked figure standing above her.

    “Come along, child,” Their voice was deep and garbled, almost as if they were using a vocal changer.  She couldn’t make out their features in the dark, only the darkness of their face. Ahsoka could tell immediately that they had taken great lengths to conceal their identity.

    “Who are you?” Ahsoka was on her feet in fighting stance.

    “It does not concern you,”

    “Oh, I’m sure it does. Who _are_ you?”

    “I have a… proposition for you, youngling,” _Youngling?_ Who was this? Ahsoka was _sure_ she had heard that voice before.

    “I’m no youngling!” The figure gave a strange, heavy laugh.

    “Of course not. Follow me, and I will help you.” Ahsoka didn’t trust them. She tried reaching out with the Force to learn their identity and encountered only darkness. Ahsoka became very aware of how vulnerable she was. She was unarmed and she had nowhere to go.

    “No!” One of the Coruscant police started towards them.

   “Is everything all right, miss?”

    Before Ahsoka could answer, the figure waved his hand.

   “It does not concern you.”  
   “It does not concern me.” The guard turned and returned to his post.

   “You’re a Jedi!” The figure laughed again.

   “I am not a Jedi.” At once, Ahsoka realized who it was.

    “Dooku!” The figure-Dooku-drew his lightsaber.

   He couldn’t! They were barely away from the Jedi Temple! Surely somebody would help her! Ahsoka stumbled back as he approached her.

    “I am in need of a new apprentice,” He started, “and I hear you are… unemployed.”

    “I’ll never join you!” He threw his hood back and smiled coldly at her. 

    “You will!” He swung his lightsaber at her. Ahsoka could only leap back.

    “No!”

     Ahsoka gritted her teeth. There had to be some way for her to escape. She glanced around. _Kriff!_ There was no train, the guards would be no help, and the Temple lay behind her. She supposed that she could leap into the oncoming traffic and pray that she landed on top of a fast speeder. Ahsoka didn't think she had any better options, so she charged past Dooku and leaped into the air.

    Flailing, her feet finally found purchase on the broad surface of a commercial taxi. The driver, obviously annoyed, shouted at her. Ahsoka launched herself in the air again and found herself running along the top of a building. She had no plan, no time and she was out of options.  Beneath her, the entrance to the Coruscant underworld loomed. Even for her, the jump was too far. Dooku approached her, laughing evilly.

    Any moment now, he would strike and-

    Another hooded figure landed between them.

    “Hello… Master.” Ahsoka’s heart stopped. She knew that voice. 

     "Ventress," She whispered. 

                                             -----------------------------------

    Barriss paced her cell.  She couldn't remember what happened. Was she sick? Where was Master Luminara? She couldn't remember anything solid, only snippets. 

     Explosions. 

      Searches. 

      Confessing to a crime she couldn't remember. 

      Where was she?  

     Her last clear memory was old, she knew that much. It was of her, leaving the Temple, laughing with Ahsoka as they ventured into the open-air markets of Coruscant. Ahsoka had been called away in the middle of their walk. Somebody had given her something-a gift. Barriss couldn't remember what it was. Where was Ahsoka? 

     She reached out into the Force, searching. But she felt nothing but fear and surprise. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm hoping to update tomorrow!  
> I love it when you guys comment and say hi on Tumblr! It really means the world to me!
> 
> Please come and say hi!
> 
> Email: pitlyd265@gmail.com  
> Tumblr: @classylunafan
> 
> I love you guys!
> 
> -Eliza


	3. Force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahsoka confronts Dooku, a familiar face shows up, and she meditates.

Ventress threw back her hood and brandished her lightsabers.  _ But how?  _ Hadn’t Barriss stolen those sabers just yesterday? Anakin had shown them to the court! Ahsoka had seen one of the guards take them! 

    However Ventress had retrieved the lightsabers, Ahsoka was glad she was there. 

    “Catch!” Ventress tossed her one of the red weapons. Ahsoka caught it in a reverse grip and activated it. Immediately, she knew she hated the curved design of the handles. They rested oddly in her hands, and the black grips dug unpleasantly into her palm. She felt no connection with the sword, but at least she had a weapon. 

    Meanwhile, Ventress had already engaged Dooku in combat. Ahsoka knew that, even together, they were outmatched, but she knew she had to help Ventress. She leaped into the fray and swung her saber at Dooku’s exposed neck. It was a long shot, she knew that, but Ahsoka figured neither of them had much to lose. As she expected, Dooku moved back and Ahsoka spun and engaged his blade midair. She landed in a kneel and watched as Ventress charged her former master again, baring her teeth in rage.

    “You abandoned me!”    
    “You had outlived your purpose!” Ahsoka saw what Dooku was about to do, and sprinted at him. To both of their surprise, she barrelled straight into him and sent him flying over the edge of the building. Ahsoka reeled on the edge but regained her footing. She watched his figure flutter into the traffic, and his lightsaber clattered to the ground beside Ahsoka, and she picked it up. 

    “He isn’t dead,” Ventress purred as Ahsoka offered her a hand. 

    “I know,” Ahsoka paused, “but that fall-” she froze, “Look out!” Ventress dove to the side as yet  _ another  _ cloaked figure landed in front of her, glowing green lightsaber in hand. She hadn’t seen them coming until she saw their lightsaber flashing in the darkness. 

    “Hey, kid,” They threw off their cloak. 

    “Master Vos!” The Jedi smirked at her. Ahsoka frowned.  _ Great, a Jedi.  _

    “Don’t look so surprised, kid. I was about to head into the underworld when I saw the  _ overwhelming  _ surplus of red lightsabers up here and I decided to check it out.” 

      He grinned at Ahsoka and deactivated his lightsaber, “Good to see you, Ventress!” Confounded, Ahsoka looked at Ventress, who just shrugged, “Are you two all right?” Both nodded.

     “By the way, nice kick! That should knock out Dooku for a while… Speaking of which, I should go find him! Nice talking to you both!” He was about to leap off the edge, when he turned to Ahsoka, “Oh, and Ahsoka?” Ahsoka blinked. Never had any Jedi Master besides Obi-Wan call her Ahsoka, “I’m sorry that the Council treated you the way you did. I never would have said you were guilty. And I would’ve left the Jedi, too.” Ahsoka was shocked. It was so unlike the Jedi to admit they were wrong. Then again, Quinlan Vos wasn’t exactly a  _ typical  _ Jedi. Actually, Ahsoka had considered him to be one of the ‘good’ Jedi.. Especially because he was never one to strictly obey the Code. Ahsoka felt more tears sting her eyes. 

    “Master Vos, I-” She didn’t know what to say. 

    “Stay safe, kid,” Vos pulled something off his belt and tossed it at her. Ahsoka caught it, and when she looked up, Vos was gone. She looked at Ventress. 

    “Are you all right?” 

    “Fine,” Ventress muttered. 

     Both women stood awkwardly for a moment until Ahsoka finally broke the silence. 

    “Ventress, how did you get your lightsabers back?” Ventress paused for a moment. 

    “Your master sent one of the clones-Jesse, I think, to find me. He gave them to me a few hours ago,” Ahsoka couldn’t help the pang of anxiety that spiked through her when Ventress mentioned one of the clones visiting her. Ahsoka still hadn’t forgotten what she had done to some of the clones in the early days of the war.    
    “Is Jesse-” 

     “Yes, he’s fine. He was with another clone who had an outrageously large Republic tattoo,”

    “Kix!” She smiled. Kix was always kind to her. 

    “Yes, I believe so. Now, I have matters to attend to,” Ahsoka ignored the flash of fear that spiked through her at the thought of being alone again. It had been nice to have company, however short a time. 

    “Okay. I’ll try and contact the Senate and get the charges against you dropped,”   
    “Don’t worry about it, kid. I know how pretentious those prats can be,” 

    “Are you sure?” 

    “Yes. Besides, I think your master has some… contacts in the Senate who are probably eager to help him,” Ahsoka ignored the implication of  _ that  _ statement and smiled. 

    “Thank you for saving me,” She handed Ventress her lightsaber back. Ahsoka wanted to ask Ventress to stay with her, but she already knew what Ventress’s answer would be. 

    “You too,” Ventress flipped her mask over her face and ran off into the night.

    Once again, Ahsoka was alone. She opened the pouch Vos had given to her, and her eyes widened when she saw the unmistakable shine of credits. She decided to sit on top of the building and count them. In all, she found that Vos had given her over 5,000 credits. Enough to buy cheap lodging for at least a month, or enough to book passage on a decent ship off-world. But Ahsoka wasn’t sure she wanted to leave Coruscant yet. First of all, she had to see Barriss. Find out what had happened to her. And Ahsoka knew she still wanted to be close to Anakin and the Order, even if she wasn’t a Jedi anymore. And she knew that someday, she wanted to rejoin the fight against the dark side however she could. 

    She already knew that she wouldn’t be able to sleep after all that had happened, so she contented herself with finding a quiet rooftop and meditating on it all night. It comforted her to be so close with the Force.

    Ahsoka immediately reached across the Force and searched for Anakin. They were close in the Force; after all, she had been his Padawan. She searched for a moment before she found his familiar signature. She pushed further and nearly fainted from the furious cloud of anger, sorrow, fear, and fury that accosted her. Ahsoka pushed as deep as she could, desperate for answers. His black fury stung her, even though it was directed at the Council and Barriss. His emotions were easier to read than usual, they practically screamed at her across the Force. He was alone; that was unusual. Anakin was rarely alone at night; if he wasn’t with his not-so-secret wife, he was with Obi-Wan or Ahsoka or the clones in the barracks. She wanted to tell him to go talk to somebody, but she had no voice in the Force. She was afraid, as she always was when Anakin was angry, that he would hurt somebody. But now he was keeping himself away from anybody who could help him. Anakin was suffering, and Ahsoka knew it was her fault. 

    When Anakin’s emotions became too much for Ahsoka, she turned her mind to a more comfortable task, breathing and allowing the Force to flow through her. She needed the clarity, needed the ease and the simplicity of the silent flow in her mind, and so she meditated until the blurred Coruscant sun once again re-appeared on the horizon and she set out into the city.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a while, but I got something decent. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think! I'm @classylunafan on tumblr and I love to hear from y'all!
> 
> -Eliza


End file.
